ZANU PF UK BLOG: Mind Your Business Chaps

By Nick Mangwana

We note with a knowing smile and rub our hands with glee at the further demise of the amoeba

opposition parties in our country.

We always never comment. We have always known that they lacked an emotional energy and benefited from a protest vote emanating from the sting of the Sanction Regime they so sadistically called for. Even knowing this much we concentrate on our own business. It is such that we prefer to mind.

We have a few things happening in our party. Whatever the ins and outs of that, the opposition parties have decided that this is their business as well. Really astounding acts of voyeurism.

Surely, when members of one family are having their feuds, debates, or differences what business is it for the village idiot?

Zanu PF is made of congenial cadres and Cdes. We are bound to have fraternal differences. Whilst these may be considered unhelpful at times, we are more annoyed when we start having opposition apparatchiks masquerading as pseudo-experts on Zanu PF affairs.

Why are we having one Prof Madhuku threatening war if Zanu PF power matrices reach one outcome or the other? Shouldn’t he be concentrating on trying to democratically wrest power from us? Shouldn't he also be seeking another project as the constitution is no longer an issue? Is this the way he has decided to maintain relevance and bleed donor funds?

Why are we having one Mrs Priscilla Misihairambwi Mushonga suddenly appearing on certain forum as an adroit panelist on the outcomes of our power dynamics as if their parties are no more? Oh, of course it is that their parties are inanimate.

They have no history, no ideology and no soul. Should it not be considered a productive use of their

intellect and time to try to find a soul? If ZANU PF cadres call themselves fundis on ZANU PF that of course would make a lot of sense. It however would be considered ridiculous should I suddenly prance around as an expert on the MDC (A-Z).

Sometimes we are flattered when we are vindicated as the only business in town. But there are times when we just find these long noses poking everywhere pretty vexatious.

How can it not be annoying when we have cowards threatening war if our elective processes achieve a certain outcome? People like Morgan Tsvangirayi were old enough to join the war and help liberate the country. He chose to run and help the oppressors by brewing the Baas some tea. Suddenly with bravado he threatens to lead unrest from the front. This would be hilarious if it were not serious.

We laugh for we recall this chap running from his own shadow and using one Western Embassy as a

bolthole. That's why we ask, from whence cometh thine valour Mr Tsvangirayi?

We have always concentrated on making our party fit for the 21 st century and the delivery of our

electoral undertakings. But we cannot ignore idiotic political voyeurism. Parties whose only ideology is Mugabe Must Go! We are surely not interested in their 2 pence worth of opinion. It would do no harm for us to remind these chaps to mind their own business (if they have any).

Mr Biti also threatens war. A man with such a dysfunctional party that no one knows who actually leads it. Is it Mangoma? Is it Biti? Sekai Holland or Sipepa Nkomo? Alas we give up with a knowing smile that it is none of our business.

Whilst that rings true we will not ignore when cowards start beating war drums in feigned bravery which is ostensibly just a bluff. Surely a coward is much more inclined to quarrels than men of spirit.

If these people were brave and wanted to be useful, we would deploy them in seeking for the removal of the sanctions they instigated during one of their many times of treasonous treachery.

Should the ZANU PF business be so much of interest to these chaps, then we invite them to come and buy the card, pay subscription and be conscripted into our Cells. For they have a few things to learn and a lot to atone for.

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